The typical and the Unusual

      The other day I talked about a thing that was weighing on my mind. It was the not totally uncommon occurrence of someone asking me for information on what tool I use (the inquiries are also sometimes how I do something in particular, where to sell something, etc) and asking for a direct link after I gave a website and search terms. I mentioned how I don't like to ignore people but I don't have time, or desire, to do every bit of the work for someone. Which makes me feel selfish even though I know very well that I don't owe anyone anything when it comes to the how-tos. I also mentioned that collectively, I have probably wasted months searching for things and trying things out. I have been making dolls for nearly 17 years and I have tried a lot of different things. I was a full-time doll maker (as in easily 40-60 hours a week) for many years. I have a ridiculous amount of practice. But that doesn't mean that everything comes easy to me. Take for example this doll.

    The customer asked for a baroque style doll, had reference pics, and when I looked at the photos I immediately had a good idea of how to make the doll, even though I knew it wouldn't necessarily be easy. DOING the things is very important for the learning experience. I looked at the reference photo and knew I could make the doll because I have made so many dolls that my brain already was formulating the plan on how to make this doll happen. Even though I have never once made a doll just like this one. Do you know what happened when I got into my plan? It failed. The first attempt at this dress was absolute garbage that fought me the entire way. So I trashed it (literally) and started again. I went with a new plan, which I originally thought wouldn't work because it would be too bulky, and made a lined under skirt, with a lined overdress. And all of a sudden everything came together. The important lesson in all this is a tried something. I tried it, I tried to make it work, it didn't, I recognized it wasn't working, and I tried something else. Trial and error is a huge part of learning a craft. You need to figure out what works and what doesn't. Sometimes that means buying things you think might work for what you want them to work for, sometimes it means making a new pattern (don't get me started on how difficult pattern making can be!) and sometimes it means scrapping an attempt to try something totally new. But you definitely need to do the things to learn the things. And failing is part of learning. Thomas Edison, after inventing the lightbulb, was once asked by a reporter how it felt to fail 1,000 times. Edison replied that he did not fail 1,000 times, the light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.      

                                         

      So some dolls I make are more difficult, because I am trying something new-to-me to see if it will work. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. I am pretty sure I always learn a little something new. Which makes the more challenging dolls a little less challenging to make. And then when I can follow then up with a fairly typical doll, like this cross country rider, who has a removable vest so she can be a casual rider, I am reminded that I am pretty good at what I do. And I got that way by failing, wasting time, trying things that didn't work, and not giving up. 

     People talk about the ugly stage in painting and I have talked about the ugly stage in doll making. There is a point in painting horses where you are convinced the thing is never going to come together and you are tempted to throw it away. But if you go a bit more it gets better and you can breathe a sign of relief. In doll making, the ugly stage often lasts from the very first thing you do up until the very end when everything all of a sudden comes together. How do you keep going when your work looks like crap? You just have to trust that it will all work out. But you have to do the thing to know that you can do the thing.