Tuesday, January 20, 2009


Well I said I would probably post a blog about Travis so here we go. I am sure Elecktra will get a blog eventually as well, she is as horse crazy as I am. But first Travis. Travis is a special challenge in my life. No one wants to hear that their child is different and has problems but that is what I got.

When Elecktra was little she talked fairly early. We had words before she was a year old and sentences by the time she was 1. So when Travis was not talking or really saying words by the time he was a year and a half I started to wonder. So I talked to the doctor about it. I got nothing and nowhere for a long time. Finally when he was over 2 and a half years old and I had seen every specialist under the sun and found out his hearing was fine and anything else that might cause a speach delay, I got the diagnosis. Autism. So I did what any normal parent would do and I instantly went into denile. I couldn't have an autistic son, it couldn't be true. Anything else, ADHD was more likely in my mind. But even through my denile I was getting him as much help as I could. We have speach therapists and groups come to the house to work with him. We joined play groups with peer kids. But I didn't want to believe it. Who wants to belive their child is different and might not fit it?

Eventually denile fades with learning. I studied and realized that Travis does have autism. There is no way around that. I can't change it by saying it is not true or trying to pretend it isn't true. But it doesn't define him and I won't let it. What I learned was there are many many differnt types of autism. Some are more severe than others of course as with any other disability. I still have trouble seeing it as a disability though. If you know Travis you understand why. I'm sure a lot of people would give anything to be like Travis. He has limitations but he doesn't seem to notice. And it isn't because he isn't smart, he is. But he is almost always happy. He gets sad like any other person but he is happy more often than not. He plays like other kids and has a good time getting into group play. And everyone likes Travis. Some people don't know how to act with him or around him, but they still like him. Now how many people wouldn't love to have everyone like them? It sure would make life easier.

I of course have had trouble because of Travis's autism. Or more rightly because of ignorant people. I had to go get an x-ray after Ethan and I got in a motorcycle accident. I told the nurse that someone would have to sit with Travis to make sure he stayed out of the way and she was very rude when she asked why a 3 year old couldn't sit where I told him too for 5 minutes. So I looked at her and very calmly told her he was autistic. She said sorry but I was not sure if she was sorry that he was autistic or because she was being a bitch. Who can tell. I have a lot of people give me weird looks because Travis will sometimes make weird sounds, loudly, in public. He does talk now, but he still likes to make noise. And some people take that as a sign that I am a bad parent. So let them think what they want, just because they think it doesn't make it true.

So life goes on. Travis improves all the time. Sometimes it isn't really noticable, but sometimes it is. Either way he is a great kid and life is never boring with him. Life is never boring with either of my kids.

For his birthday last year Travis's grandparents gave him therapeutic riding lessons. Now Elecktra is a bit jealous because she has wanted to take riding for a long time. But she takes piano and she doesn't want to give it up and she can't do everything. So maybe some day. But Travis has a very good time at riding. Can't you tell?
His horse friend is P.R (Pacific Redeemer) and he is almost as old as I am. But he is a good boy. I volunteer at the riding school (for the adult riders while the kids are at school) and I have worked with P.R a lot. He is easy to lead, easy to groom and saddle, even easy to catch. You just walk up to him, he stands there, put the halter on and go. He's a good boy. And Travis loves him as you can seeIn general I think I am a very lucky parent. I have good kids. They are not perfect, they do bad things, lie a little, are messy and sometimes annoying, but they are good kids with good hearts. Elecktra is sweet and really doesn't want to make anyone upset and Travis is cute and cuddly. Not many people have a cuddly 8 year old boy. So I will deal with the bad and enjoy the good. That is all anyone can do really.

No comments: